Puraws: cool down boy..ul killing ur neurons

Me: these neurons are of no use today.. the pentiums have screwed them to their graves.. so i dont fucking give a damm to the narcissistic neurons.. my grades would vouch for this.

Puraws: see dead neuron is the 1st step towards being a moron so refrain from killing them

Me: hahaha.. those ar einstenian views my freind… as archaic as a shakesperean macbeth..so come out from ur dogmatic shells.. and see the fuckin’ new goddammm world.

Puraws: u r on ur way 2 winnng a man B or may be nobel lit. gon my friend ..if ur angst has so much power ..let me be the fuel for it and play my role in making history

Me: hahaha… definitely in the future my friend..

 

We, being the messaging support team for our client, receive numerous mails from users not able to access their email inbox. Apart from the regular stuff, we also get some really weird requests, which have varied from installing a coffee vending machine at one of the Europe offices (due to our team alias being somewhat similar to the catering company that maintains the cofffee vending machines at the location) to the below mentioned mail…

Hi. I’ve recently moved from [building] 32 to [building] 99 two months ago and can’t seem to find my mailbox in either building.  I’ve had mail sent to me during this time.  Is it possible to find out where my mailbox is and if the Mailbox service has any undelivered items for me?

 

The guy wanted us to go down to US from India to search for his mailbox. Whew!! no doubt the H1B visa quota is over subscribed in a matter of few days. Will definitely miss this stuff when I leave my job .  

The times looked all the good, the spectre of uncertainity finally having ended after a unprecedented and undetered dream run for the last couple of years. The future looked promising, or rather much lesser bleak than the present. I was to go back to school, to finish the unfinished job, to get that coveted Masters degree, and that too from a college of repute, to cut off criticism for once and for all for numerous decisions in my academic career which I had screwed up.

It was time for change again, the test of human adaptibility. The nostalgia was scathing. Acquaintances were to get replaced, friends to part, your office, however repulsive it felt earlier, seemed like something that u’ll definitely miss. Your life is about to change, the comfort zone, that you had pinstakingly built up over the years, about to vanish. Nothing could be more hellish than this, you feel.

But still the optimism prevails, the change is for good, you say yourself. You start composing your ‘Adieu’ mail, retrospecting on the various farewell letters spewed by your ex-colleagues, silently scrutinizing them all, discerning the good ones from the lot. Your mail would be the best till date, you promise yourself, as you start composing one mentally, the chain of thoughts violently interjected on one more than one ocassions with matters of the world (or rather office), only to start all over again. The tension is palpable, you start a quest for people in a similar situation, or rather soup, as you are, on the online communities, discuss with them and try to get a feel of what all is happening with others. Being lonely is fearsome, and you need company, company of people who can understand you, and who better than people who are on the same bandwagon as you are. The medley of emotions can be quite tiring at times. But isn’t this what life is all about!!!

Come gather ’round people
Wherever you roam
And admit that the waters
Around you have grown
And accept it that soon
You’ll be drenched to the bone.
If your time to you
Is worth savin’
Then you better start swimmin’
Or you’ll sink like a stone
For the times they are a-changin’. 

- Bob Dylan

Wake up Buddy, Rise and Shine,
Forget the Past, Trust the Divine;
For HE has shown us the Path, and HE shall Lead us too,
We are but mere Puppets in this Journey so new;

          The clock was ticking,  and the time running out fast. Something had to be done, and done real quick. All the mortals were running crazy, and strangely enough, nobody knew that they were mad, real mad. All running, rushing to Godknowswhere. And there I was, far from the maddening crowd, thankful enough to be spared from taking this road to perdition.

           Is this just wishful thinking. Or is it that it is I who is crazy. Unable to keep up with the pace of today’s jet paced fast forward life, trying to resign to a life that maybe I was destined to take, and at the same time, trying hard make myself sound smart enough. The ”majorly nonchalant sometimes contemplative” me tries to slow me down, ponder on what I am doing, what I should be doing, while the “ambitious” me pushes me to compete, to run faster than the fastest madman.

          Poor me! But then, who is me, is it the “majorly nonchalant sometimes contemplative” me or the “ambitious” me, or is it that there is no me after all. Or is it the ”others” pulling me in different directions, with the resultant being Me, my Self. But then, it means theres’s no Me, but a “us”. Ah! this is driving me crazy!!!! 

Unshaven and Disheveled but confidence unshaken,
My head held high and expectations unfathomable,
I strutted down the street, I could feel there was love in the air,
It seemed like St. Valentine had finally smiled upon my desire.

Customary introductions and handshakes apart,
Ah! How wonderfully I had started playing my part,
Portraying the self that I not was,
Outgoing, extroverted, and the humorous Dash.

We traversed the ruins of the Golconda rocks,
We listened enchanted to the story they spoke,
The Sultan, His Begum, the Fort and their Legends,
All stirred up my emotions that were so nascent.
 

The clouds had parted, the heavens now visible,
The journey hereafter seemed utterly feasible,
Then I felt , there was a disconnect, the romanticism faded, my confidence waded;
And I withdrew into my shell.
 

Oh Boy! The play wouldn’t keep going for long,
By and By the true colours unfold,
The thespian in me limited, the journey too far,
My depiction of my Self begins to crumble apart.

But dear Lady, please be assured of my word,
My Love for you will not diminish, come may what,
I might not have the Flamboyance, or I might not just have it enough,
But does that deny me from being your Love?

This was the famous speech delivered by Howard Roark to defend his action of destroying the Cortlandt. Mind blowing stuff.. This pretty much sums up everything Ayn Rand stood for. A must read for everyone. For the full text of the speech READ “THE FOUNTAINHEAD” COMPLETELY and for all those who believe in shortcuts, please jump here.

Often I find it hard to imagine how absolutely can a line etched on a map by an English lawyer, Sir Cyril Radcliffe, sitting thousands of miles away, divide the people of a country, who, till then, had been united under the same British regime, sharing the same dream of freedom from the British rule. It’s hard to digest that the line on the paper sometimes ran through the middle of existing villages, or even houses, and we accepted it as it is. No excuse can justify such insensitivity, not even the generally accepted theory that we were not willing to delay our freedom. If this is true, our leaders are guilty of genocide. Coz whatever be the ends, means do matter. This line led to mass migration of people, brutally uprooted from their roots on the basis of religion. Once the lines were established, about 14.5 million people crossed the borders to what they hoped was the relative safety of religious majority. The newly formed governments were completely unequipped to deal with migrations of such staggering magnitude, and massive violence and slaughter occurred on both sides of the border. Estimates of the number of deaths range around roughly 500,000, with low estimates at 200,000 and high estimates at 1,000,000 (quoted from wikipedia). I strongly believe that the partition could never have been on the agenda of the general masses, who, till then, had co-existed peacefully.Being a resident of Hyderabad, I can vouch for the fact that Hindus and Muslims have lived and can live together. If the Berlin wall can come down, can’t the Radcliffe line.. Death to India and Pakistan, Long live BHARAT.. Howazzat????

“Comon guys, its better late than never,
Fill up your heart with love for the other,
Rise up, its time to usher in the Revolution,
Brace yourselves for the sweet Unification…”

… and I decide to go for the kill. Slowly and steadily, I move upto my unsuspecting victim, positioning my hand just behind its back. A whoosh and a thump…., and my victim lay perfectly still, in a pool of blood, devoid of any vital signs. My conscience deplores me… my religion haunts me. To kill is a sin, they all seem to be unanimous about it. And to kill in such a cold blooded manner is worse still. But is murder for self defense a sin??? The blood that has been spilt was my blood, sucked mercilessly by the now lifeless and bloody mosquito until it was too full to even fly. To exercise my right to a good night’s sleep, the mosquito had to be killed. And I have to take countless such lives mercilessly every night just to enjoy some sleep, to be able to dream about tomorrow’s dreams. I am reminded of Nana Patekar’s immortal lines: “Saala ek macchaar aadmi ko hijra bana deta hai….”. Nothing can be farther from this truth .

Disheartened and burdened, I lie awake,
Like a rudderless ship in an unpredictable wind,
Floating around in the ocean,
Going wherever the wind does take.

Everyday is a new day, a new dream,
Yesterday’s dreams all forgotten,
Tossed around by today’s tide,
Never understanding where do I belong.

Only aiming to make it real BIG,
The horizon visible, but the path none,
Oh God ! I am doomed, I often think,
But my life must go on and on.

And thence it occured to me,
why not put pen onto paper,
And give life to my numerous thoughts,
And thus relieve my tortured soul.

And to conserve the environment, I took a vow,
Not to put my pen on to the paper, but to create a web log,
Thus was born this worthless blog,
To relieve thy self, but to torture thou soul….